Last night I dreamed that I was watering a bunch of flowers and seedlings. Probably a good sign, right? Today is sad and disappointing, but tomorrow there’s hope and the start of new life. Tomorrow there is sunshine.
This morning my doctor said to definitely discontinue meds. I’m a little disappointed at how yesterday was handled. The doctor seemed pretty sure this pregnancy wasn’t viable at the ultrasound in the morning and said I should discontinue all meds. Later in the day when the nurse called to say my beta had actually risen a bit, she said to continue meds. So confusing. Thankfully I can now stop the meds and hopefully the miscarriage will begin soon. I have no idea what to expect.
It’s weird that I had a decreasing beta on Monday and then a slightly increasing beta on Thursday. I think we can attribute that to the fact that Monday’s beta was taken at a different lab. The pregnancy is certainly not viable at this point, but the down/up thing seems fishy to me. It should really only be decreasing at this point.
The plan is to go in on Monday for beta #7 and another ultrasound. Fingers crossed that my numbers are dropping. (Never thought I’d say that.)
P.S. Yesterday, the day that we found out that we’re not actually having a baby (this time), marked four weeks since the transfer that got us our first ever BFP. I am so looking forward to putting this behind us, but I suspect I won’t be able to until the miscarriage is complete. I am excited to look ahead to tomorrow. I’m looking forward to a new BFP with a baby that mother nature wants to stick around.